Maybe tomorrow

"I'm swinging on the constellations of my vanity
I'm sailing through the machinations of mundanity"

I captured a ball of fading light in my left hand before it faded into a darkness. It took me by surprise and it took me back to a time in the distant past. 

faustain - maybe tomorrow

Youthdom was the energy that sparked curiosity that eventually lit the fuse to many an incendiary incident, but more acutely, to the mystery of knowledge. The secret places that have always been there but, so often, have become overlooked or avoided by the masses. The masses; that unequivocal crowd of thoughtless idiots. those mainstreamers: the unexceptional agglomeration of mediocre abilities.  Yes, they. They spurred me. they initiated in me an urge to be not part of their gang.. to be anything but them; anything that distanced myself from them and their disabled thoughts and ideas was the course I ventured....
and so it was and so it continues. the disdain I found then has and still does serve me well. I feel fatigued sometimes, having to tolerate the everyday senselessness of this modern age. Yes, it gets me down/ It drags me into the dark depths sometimes but this is just an unfortunate consequence of being true to the ideal to not capitulate! And I don't overlook the fact that I am a stupid man. I am as idiotic as most/ as pathetic and ignorant of many of the fundamental problems and solutions. I'm only aware of the most subtle of my inadequacies. Oh yes I, am as bad as the rest I must concede. I'm not better or wiser. I just happen to see things in a slightly different light. It is not an advantage. It is a cumbersome thing. it weighs heavy on me, I expect no praise or condolences. I gave up on expectations long ago. I simply accept the status. Acceptance with reluctance and often a vitriolic internal scream. I am hindered, I am suffused with antipathy.

I once met Bo Diddly. His big hand shook my small youthful 17 year old hand.. "How you doin' man?" he asked in his big deep southern drawl. "The Originator".  had his Gretsch G6138 right next to him, about to take the stage at Henry Africas, York Street, Glasgow, March 1983. I've never met a famous person since that day!

And how it might just be that nothing really matters...
  faustain.maybe tomorrow mp3